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Is it wrong to have favorites amongst my kids? I have two daughters and a son but the youngest is so adorable and sweet it’s hard for her not to be my favorite. How do I make sure this isn’t obvious in the way I treat each of them?

For me the answer is yes it is wrong to favor one child over another but hasn’t this been an age old thing for some, remember the story of Cain and Abel? Let’s not lose sight though that children are different and we love them in different ways. Won’t you always have a special bond with your first born? You don’t respond to a teenager the same way that you do to a toddler. You love each child for who they are. They are individuals with different needs and those needs are hopefully met by us as parents. Don’t get too paranoid though that you don’t show your children your feelings. Kids are good at making us feel guilty about favorites. I still tell my Mum that my brother is the blue eyed boy and can do no wrong and I am 45. You need to reassure your kids that they are loved especially for who they are. You should spend one on one time with all your kids as much as you can.

 

I have a 14 month old son and he’s constantly getting into things and touching things he knows he’s not supposed and he understands the word no. I know babies get into things but what should I do when no doesn’t work. He’s starting to laugh at me when I get frustrated. Also if I have something that he wants he will pinch me and scratch me and scream at me at the top of his lungs until I give it to him. He has meltdowns because he refuses to hold his own sippy cup and wants me to do it for him. My husband blames it on me and tells me that I have created a spoiled monster. What kind of techniques can I really use on a 1 yr old? PLEASE HELP!

Maybe there are “too many” rules. First of all decide what the rules are and stick to them, then it will easier to pick your battles. Hearing “no” all day can be rather overwhelming. If your son is getting into things that are dangerous, then say Stop, danger, instead of no. If he constantly heads for the off limit objects then remove him from the situation and put him in another place for a minute, like time –out. Explain why you did this, as always consistency is key. Regarding the meltdowns over the sippy cup, ignore him, he is getting your attention so he keeps doing it. You and your husband should be a united front and using the same techniques with your son.

 

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